Shalom Life | April 03, 2015

Drake Got Picked On Hardcore for April Fool's Day

But if anyone can take a joke, it's the 6 God himself

By: Daniel Koren

Published: April 1st, 2015 in Culture » Music » News

Drake Got Picked On Hardcore for April Fool's Day

Photo: Drake on Tinder

Credit: Complex


April Fool's Day is a glorious day for writers, the one day we can throw our integrity out the window and come up with the most fabricated, misconstrued, illegitimate pieces of fiction imaginable, while posing them for non-fiction.

While many weren't gaga about our Shia LaBeouf converting to Islam story, it was a pleasure to write and come up with nonetheless. Like c'mon guys, can't you take a joke?

And of course, there were other wonderful April Fool's jokes shared today - my personal favorite being Tesla's Apple Smartwatch parody.

tesla-motors-model-w

Photo Credit: Tesla

On this particular day of fools, it seems no one was ridiculed as hard, and as much, as Toronto's own 6 God Drizzy Drake, though given the innocuous nature of the jokes, I assume he was laughing his ass off along with the rest of them. I guess it shouldn't be too surprising. After all, Drake is ripe for parody.

First, there was the Complex article titled 'Drake Was Spotted on Tinder Last Night,' claiming that Drizzy was "scheming on the low" in Toronto last night. They even got his interests right - The Toronto Raptors, Young Money, OVO Sound, and, well, Complex.

It's the last one that gave it away, though; shameless advertising. Obviously if it was his real Tinder profile, there'd be the Shalom Life logo instead. He is a member of the tribe after all.

Then, there was this delightful story by AUX which claimed Drizzy was returning to his role as 'Wheelchair Jimmy' on Degrassi: The Next Generation (is that show even around anymore?).

Per AUX:

"Like Aubrey Graham himself—who, on If You’re Reading This It’s Too Late, depicts himself as Toronto’s prodigal son returning home a hero—Jimmy returns to Degrassi High a changed man. And for the better: Reports suggest that jock-inclined Jimmy returns to his high school as a massive athletic success story.

His sport? You guessed it. Wheelchair basketball."

That story isn't as far fetched, considering what a hero Drake is in the city of Toronto.

Lastly, VICE's food magazine Munchies published a hilarious piece called "I Ate Centaur Meat with Drake in the Alps," where journalist Scotty Smalls recalls meeting Aubrey for half horse-half human at a chic restaurant in France.

centaur3

Photo Credit: Munchies

“Centaurs, to me, are the perfect animal,” Drake 'said' to Smalls. “When I was growing up—after I got out of hockey but when I was filming for CTV—my family was dirt-poor. Sometimes all we could afford was centaur and Timbits, and it sustained us. Centaur still came in a tin back then.”

Oh man, centaur in a tin and Timbits. Those were the gold old days.

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